Tonight I try again, tonight I try and take a step further in my journey. I’m going into town to an addiction recovery support group, hopefully I won’t have the same problem as last week because I’ve arranged to meet someone beforehand.
I’m nervous now, wondering if I really need to go, or am I just making a bit of a fuss. Either way I’m determined that this time I will succeed.
I’ll write again after I’ve been, either tonight or tomorrow morning. I think it’s important that I write down how it made me feel.
Today I spoke to my “distance sponsor” from NA for the first time. He encouraged me to go to a local meeting tonight and I did manage to get into town and walk to the place, but I couldn’t go in. I saw other people walking in but I couldn’t bring myself to do the same. Continue reading “Narcotics Anonymous”
I had my weekly counselling session on Monday, was a really good one. Helen helped me realise how I’ve changed over past weeks, I’m finally holding my head up more and trying to work out why things have been the way they have. I’ve gone from blubbing about it all, to actually thinking about why. Continue reading “Another step”
I wanted to share a helpful tip with everyone about what not to do when someone has had a drug problem. Continue reading “A helpful tip”
I’m 20 miles from your house, 20 miles from where you now live, and not very many more from where you lived when you first stuck a needle in my arm. I’ve not been any where near you for the past five months, not since you cut me off with a swipe of a finger on your phone. Continue reading “20 miles”
Just read a post on twitter that used the term “head zaps”, I’ve never heard it before, but I’ve felt them.
It was withdrawal from meth, whenever I didn’t use, I’d get jolts in my head, like electric shocks. Sometimes I’d get them as I was falling asleep, those scared the hell out of me and I’d be snapped awake in a second and be so confused. Continue reading “Head zaps”
To continue the sorry story…….
So we’d met, we’d slammed, and we had what felt like the most amazing sex. Unfortunately it didn’t stop there, it should have, but it didn’t. Continue reading “More…….”
I made a post on twitter yesterday about how long it’s been since I touched any drugs, just over four months. The reaction I’ve had has been amazing, so many likes and wonderful comments. My drug use isn’t something I talk about to anyone, so being open about it on here and on Twitter was a big step, but one I’m glad I took. Continue reading “Overwhelmed”
I walked into his house and within minutes we were in the bedroom, two syringes sat there waiting. I wish now I’d turned away and gone home, they were the first of so many with him and I regret every single one. Continue reading “Two syringes”
I was invited to a chem sex party, four guys. I’d watched guys slam in videos online, was intrigued, had seen guys do it in person but had never been tempted, not until that night. Continue reading “My first time”